Motherhood & Burnout

Motherhood & Burnout

Hello beautiful my name is Chernell and I am your health & energy coach. I am a mom of 3, a wife, entrepreneur, author, little sister and part of the sandwich generation taking care of ourselves, our kids and our parents. I use my expertise as a registered massage therapist, personal trainer and health coach to help overwhelmed, exhausted and burnt out moms go from feeling stuck in health and in motherhood to feeling vibrant energy and empowered in their health so they can build their own confident, joyful life and still eat the damn cake! (No diet culture BS here)

8 years ago, I experienced extreme exhaustion and burnout with my 1st daughter. Your entire life changes in an instant and it was hard to recognize myself. I cried a lot, argued a lot, my general mood changed pretty drastically and my cravings were all over the place. I didn’t feel like myself and I thought being a health professional, I would be able to balance all of the things, life, relationships, friendships, self care. And it was not that way. I felt broken. And I thought THAT is what motherhood would always feel like. I hit my breaking point and I knew something needed to change and it lead me to combine my education, training and research to serve moms just like you.

So today we will be taking a quick look at what burnout looks and feels like, for you. How to notice it and what small steps you can take today to feel better.

What is burnout?

Burnout is not only physical, but also emotional, spiritual and physiological.

Burnout is a state of exhaustion very common caregivers and in parents because you are always the helper and are always needed. You can feel drained all the time, you can feel helpless and alone.

You have stepped into arguably one of the most amazing & hard seasons of life, where you put your needs on the back burner and devote every minute to this new little being and your family. It is Inspiring the strength of a mother, what we manage to do when we are exhausted. Our capacity is stretched. (We are damn magicians if you ask me)

But you don’t have to exist in this state of exhaustion forever. I thought I would never feel like myself again, until I realized that my needs, mattered too, your needs, your desires, your wants are important too. That’s what makes you, YOU. Ignoring these, stuffing them down increases the stress response in your body. Along with lack of sleep, decreased movement, new pressures, and expectations, this can wreak havoc on your digestion, moods, cravings, hormones and ability to experience joy.

Your stress response is on overdrive. In prehistoric times it was the lion, today it’s the noise and crying, it’s your boss or coworkers, the deadlines, the obligations, it’s the judgement, the hundreds of opinions and choices, it’s the worry, the guilt, the feeling that you’re not being or doing enough.

When your body is in this long-term state of stress your nervous system reacts. It feels it is being threatened, it stays in this emergency fight, flight or freeze response and this affects every system in your body, flooding it with cortisol and adrenaline. In short bursts stress can be beneficial, but chronic stress is detrimental.

Here are some things to look for:

If your body is in Fight mode – You are irritated all the time, little things annoy you now, you have episodes of rage and anger and you feel frustrated.

Flight mode – You are anxious most of the time, you’re worried about every last thing, feeling unsure about decisions, scared.

Freeze mode – You feel nothing, you feel numb, you shut down, nothing really sparks joy anymore, you feel disconnected and sluggish.

Along with extreme exhaustion, this has you feeling stuck, alone, misunderstood, and guilty for wanting a different experience. Right? You should just be grateful, but you feel broken down. Giving birth is only the beginning, and you may have suffered trauma before, during or after childbirth. But now you have endless worries, and decision fatigue. Sleepless nights and new challenges and navigating a world in a body that doesn’t quite feel like yours anymore. You’re taking in a lot, and you need a safe outlet.

Here is where the transformation begins, acknowledging that you don’t feel your best, understanding that there is community and support for you, having gratitude, but also compassion for yourself, allowing those emotions and feelings to flow in, through and out. (you gotta feel all the feels) and giving yourself grace.  Knowing you have the ability to create your energy, is powerful.

So here is how you can start to cope with and heal some of your burnout and exhaustion.

1.

Start to notice your energy Gains & Drains – What fills you up and gives you energy? What foods help you feel nourished, what types of movies, what activities, who are the people in your life that light you up or make you feel energized help you feel connected. On the other side, what makes you feel down, sluggish or like you need to recover, what interactions drain you? What things are you seeing, hearing, eating that make you feel heavy or low energy? Take note and start to add in more energy gains and decrease those energy drains.

2.

Movement – Movement, is a major key (yup that’s some DJ Khaled for you) to move emotions through your body, to help reset your stress hormones. To release endorphins and dopamine, to help regulate your sleep and increase your ability to be resilient, not to mention, feeling really strong and confident is a plus. Add in nature, sunlight or some good music and you have a recipe to help improve your energy and fight burnout.

3.

Any form of emotional release. A good cry, scream or a deep belly laugh. A good hug, 2 minutes of deep breathing or a real conversation with someone you trust, dancing, singing, painting, any form of creativity is a beautiful way to allow your senses and body to know it’s safe to let go.

Now this is just the beginning and I hope you found value here and real life strategies you can apply. You are not alone, many of us experience this, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. I want you to know that You are Worthy, You are Capable, and You are Enough. I appreciate you, thank you for your precious time and I wish you nothing but more love and more energy.

Now if you feel like you are stuck in the depths of exhaustion and burnout, please join our Newsletter above and get “4 quick ways to decrease burnout” For those of you who feel like you have some tools, but you need some individualized strategies, please book a breakthrough call.